The Year-Long Ad Experience | Bad Internet


(beeping) – All right, the taquito
train is pulling into coffee table station. – Okay, Carl. They’ve added every
episode of Ray Donovan. So we are good to go. – Well then let’s get our
Donovan onavan. (laughs) – Okay. – [Voiceover] Please
select your ad experience. Brought to you by Chompsky’s
Kettle Chips. The chips that go chomp. – Oh, cool. If we watch a five minute ad
now, we can watch the entire show
without a single commercial. – We should do it. I hate commercials. – Hold on. Or we can watch a one year ad and never have to watch another
commercial for the rest of our lives. (intense music) – Oh yeah, sounds good to me. – Okay. Let’s try it. – [Voiceover] Your one year ad
experience brought to you by Chompsky’s
will begin momentarily. And remember, say nothing
bad about the product. – That last part was extremely
specific. – [Voiceover] Beginning in
three, two, one. (static) – Okay, I guess it didn’t work. – Or did it? (intense music) Ow. No. Okay, that didn’t work. I don’t know what I
thought would happen there. I’m dumb. (intense music) Naomi? (loud buzzing) – (screaming) Carl! Carl! (intense music) – Naomi? Naomi, where are you? (strange, muffled talking) Who’s there? (cheering) – Yeah! Banter, enter, banter. – Watching the big game with my
best bros, plus a big bag of Chompsky’s
Kettle Chips. What could be better? – Maybe a six pack of brew dogs. – That’s what I’m talking about,
y’all. (laughing) – I’m sorry, what is happening? – Game night, Carl. And no game is complete
without Chompsky’s, and they come in three delicious
flavors. Original, salt and vinegar, and
barbeque. – Mmm, BBQ for my BFF’s. – Oh, hell no! – Yeah, but I thought
we were supposed to be, you know, watching a commercial. – This is the commercial, Carl. An artificial reality to
let you hear all about Chompsky’s delicious snack
crisps for one full year. – Enough with the science
lesson. Less chat, more chips! – Don’t worry. You’ll have 12 full
months to get used to it. In the meanwhile, enjoy
what really matters. Football, friends,
America, and Chompsky’s. – Carl. – Oh, Naomi! – Uh oh. Wife alert.
(siren blares) – What’s going on here? – Oh we’re just eating some
delicious Chompsky’s Kettle Chips and
we’re… watching a chick flick. – Carl. Are we really stuck here for a
whole year? – Hey, hey. It’s all going to be worth it
when we’re watching Ray Don’s ad free,
remember? Come on. (chuckling) (intense music) – This is weird for two reasons. (banging on door) – Sorry. Didn’t mean to scare you. I just moved in upstairs. Thought I’d come down to say hi. – Hi. I’m Naomi. – I’m not bothering you, am I? – No. Actually, it’s kind of
nice to talk to someone, you know, normal. This place is kind of weird. – I shouldn’t be telling you
this, but I have a secret. – About this place? Yes, what is it? – What if I told you… that Chompsky’s are low in fat? – Oh my god. – It’s okay. It is a sinful little
secret for us ladies. Try one! – No, I don’t want it. I don’t want it! I don’t! (intense music) – Chip? (groans) Follow @Chompsky’s on Twitter! – Carl. I think I just killed… Wait. Where is everyone? – I…I don’t know. (cheering) – Banter, enter, banter. – Watching the big game with my
best bros plus a big bag of Chompsky’s
Kettle Chips. What could be better? – Maybe a six pack of brew dogs. (banging on door) – Sorry. Didn’t mean to scare you. I just moved in upstairs. Thought I’d come down and say
hi. (intense music) – (muffled) It’s a sinful
secret for us ladies. Try one. Ooh, try one. – Uh oh. Wife alert, wife alert. – Have you guys seen Carl? – All right. Got a fresh bowl of Chompsky’s
for my football bros. – Oh snap! – Shut up. – Oh snap. – Whoa, whoa. Sweetie, what’s wrong? – I just, I can’t really do this
anymore. It’s just the relentless
advertising is really getting to me. (yelling and cheering) – That is some good sports. – Hey, hey. It’s almost over, remember? Before you know it, we’ll be
back home with what really matters. Our friends. Our family. America. And of course, Chompsky’s. – Look at you, Carl! – Hey, hey. Watch the chips. – You’re becoming like one of
these three. (laughing) You let this place get to you. – That is not true. You’re hysterical. Have some potato chips and
relax. – Screw potato chips. I hate Chompsky’s! (sirens blare) – Naomi, sweetie, remember
what the commercial guy said. Don’t say anything bad about the
product. – I don’t care. It’s a garbage chip. This whole ad is garbage. It’s the same poorly
written, tone deaf crap that made me hate commercials
in the first place. – Negative product talk
detected. Ad experience compromised. – Who are you talking to? (intense music) – Customer account number
122684. You are guilty of spreading
unpleasant brand association. – What are you gonna do? Kill us? Good. I want to wake up. (chuckles) – Wake up. Oh, Naomi. That’s not how things work here. – Oh my god. If you die in the ad,
you die in real life. – Close. The ad reloads. – Another year? I barely even made it through
this. I can’t do that again. – Prepare to reload ad in three, two, one. – Wife alert. All of your wives are here. (sirens blare) (nervous chattering) – Where are we going? Naomi. – Hey, stop them. They’re not permitted to enter
other ads. (screaming) (eerie music) – Don’t worry. I’m here to save you. – Oh, thank god. Should we hide? – Save you from razor burn. With the new Quantum Seven
razor, now with the built in cooling
strip. (upbeat music)
– No! (panting) – Hola, amigo. Are you paying too much
for your car insurance? – Come on! – There’s no escape! (evil laughter) – [Naomi] Oh my god. We’re animated. – [Carl] And we’re a…blobs? – [Voiceover] Do you feel
depressed? Tired? – [Naomi] Run, Carl. – [Carl] I’m going as fast as I
can. – [Voiceover] Like you
should just give up? Turn yourself in. (upbeat party music) – To the nights I’ll never
remember, with the jeans I’ll never
forget. – I’m so confused. – Yeah, totally. Like, what does that
have to do with jeans? – We can’t let you leave. Without viewers, commercial
archetypes like us would have no reason to exist. – Besides. I don’t think Carl even wants to
go. He’s a Chompsky’s man now. Isn’t that right, Carl? – Carl? (grunts) You saved us? Why? – You kidding me? I don’t want to exist anymore. All I do is say racist
one-liners written by some digital marketing
employee who doesn’t know anything about how real black
people talk. – Well, you have a new purpose
now. You’re getting us out of here. – Let’s get jiggy with it. What? Come on, let’s go. We got to get out of here! Go, go, go, go! Out the way! (upbeat party music) (cheering) Go, go, go. Hurry, hurry, hurry. – [Carl] Is it safe? – Shut up. All right. Let’s go. (soft music) – Where are we? – [Voiceover] The new Titan
Telesto. Muscle forward. – Okay. All we need to do is
stay absolutely quiet, and they won’t know we’re in
here. – [Voiceover] They’re in here. – Go, go, go, go go! Back in the trunk! Back in the trunk! No! We’re stuck in here. Damn. – Don’t be so sure. I have a plan. We just need to stay alive
a couple seconds longer. – Okay. Yo. As long as I’m here, ain’t
nobody gonna hurt you. (screams) – Carl? What’s going on? – I’m sorry, Naomi. I can’t let you do this to
Chompsky’s. – They’re just a potato chip! – They’re all I know. Every, every happy emotion. Every memory. They’re all tied to
those potato chips now. – That’s sick. – No. That’s advertising. – Okay, cool it. We know you took a semester in
philosophy. – Don’t come any closer. – I know you’re still in there. Underneath all that
cringe-worthy commercial slang. – They’re on fleek. (groans) – You still know what matters. – (in unison) Ray Donovan. – You’re right. (intense music) Naomi, what’s your plan? There’s still 15 seconds left in
the ad. – Exactly. You know what happens when
there’s 15 seconds left in an ad? – Of course. The Skip Ad option! Okay, we give up now. Yeah. – Prepare to reload ad. – Sorry. We will watch this commercial.
– Three, two, one. – Advertise this. (intense music) – We’re back. (coughs) – I’m sorry, Naomi. I should’ve listened to you all
along. – The important thing is… – Ow. – Is that we made it
out and we aren’t slaves to the whims of advertising. Now let’s watch Ray Donovan. Sundays at 10, only on Showtime. – New episodes coming 2016. (upbeat music) ♪On account of the people
watching♪ – [Voiceover] This whole
thing has been an ad for Ray Donovan. Next up, it’s the best Superbowl
commercials ever aired. And be sure to check out other
content recommended just for you, like an episode of Suits,
with branded integration from Office Depot, and a
deodorant ad that’s so crazy, it now counts as entertainment. High quality content
is at your fingertips. So make your viewing complete
with new Chompsky’s no grease potato
chips. The only chip that leaves
no residue on your fingers or your remote control. This voiceover-based Chompsky’s
ad is brought to you by Ray
Donovan. Oh god. What’s happening? It never ends!

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *