Today’s Friday. That’s usually when
I meditate a little bit and kind of clear my head over
this long, stressful week. It’s also kind of great
to embrace the quiet and embrace —
[ Laughing ] -Yeah, yeah, Da-da!
Yeah, yeah! [ Laughing ] -All new “Tonight Show:
At Home Edition” starts now. [ Laughter ] [ Laughing continues ] You have lost —
you’re upside down. You’re upside down.
[ Laughing ] ♪♪ -Hi, everybody. What a long week
it’s kind of been. But thank you so much for
tuning in and watching our show and giving to all these
great charities. A couple people have asked
if I am giving to these charities as well,
and, yes, my family is donating to every charity
that we’ve mentioned so far during these shows. And thank you so much.
Every amount counts. So I really appreciate that. And, man, it’s been a really
interesting week. Day 15, is it? Day 15, and I just want to say
first off, Hoda, I feel you, buddy. And everyone’s just showing
their creative ways of dealing with this and being so kind to
each other out there. And I want to say thank you
for that. I miss my crew and everybody
back at the show. But everyone helping us here,
I am so proud of this team. Thank you, everyone involved
in “The Tonight Show,” and thank you to my neighbors,
by the way. I’ve been getting a bunch
of drawings from kids saying that —
what their favorite bits are and thanking me
for doing the show. And today I got an edible
arrangement. I didn’t even know they do this. It was just a box of vegetables. I didn’t know they do that.
It wasn’t arranged at all. It was really nice, fresh
vegetables from Anonymous, from a neighbor that said, “Thank you so much
for the shows you’re doing. You’re making us feel happier
and calming me down,” something like that. Thank you for whoever sent that
and didn’t want credit. I want to give you credit.
Thank you so much for that. I appreciate it. Now I’d like to do
some monologue jokes that really go over — they go
over really well. So here we go. Should I — maybe I’ll walk in. Hey, everybody. Welcome to “The Tonight Show:
At Home Edition.” -Whoo-hoo.
-Well, it’s Friday night and the weekend is here. If you’re bummed that you’re
stuck inside, just imagine that you have two brunches,
a kid’s birthday party, and a dance recital to go to. [ Imitates cheering ] That is getting pots and pans
banging everywhere. People are applauding
for that joke. I really need to get out. I watch so much TV that
I’ve now memorized the entire William Shatner sleep apnea
commercial. [ Imitates Shatner ]
“William Shatner here. You know, I’ve been using
a CPAP machine for over ten years and it’s made
a world of difference to me.” Seriously, though,
I’m watching so much TV, today I accidentally called my
daughters Kendall and Kylie. I’m so desperate to get outside, when someone throws one item
in the garbage, I bag it up and take it out
to the trash can. BRB.
Be right back. I’m really running out of ways
to stay entertained. Last night I left our
back door open and prayed raccoons would come in. Things are getting a little
crazy at the house. This afternoon I went into the
bathroom and caught my Roomba in the dark
watching “Wall-E.” “Someone’s in here.” My Roomba told me to knock. I saw that Hallmark is giving
away one million free cards so people can send notes
to loved ones. That’s really great because
if there’s one thing we need right now, it’s people touching
licked envelopes. And finally, I saw a poll that
said men are less likely to follow social distancing
guidelines than women, which means a year from now,
the only people on Earth will be four billion women
and Dr. Fauci. That’s tonight’s monologue.
[ Laughter ] I got a little camera shake
there. Tonight’s guests are Tina Fey,
who I just love. I’ve known her forever now
from “Saturday Night Live,” and she used to write for me,
then we were “Weekend Update” partners, and then the rest
is — she’s amazing. I thank her so much.
She’s going to be talking about cityharvest.org. We’re also going to talk to
Chef Jose Andres, who is just awesome. He’s on the cover of
“Time” magazine right now for what he’s doing
with World Central Kitchen, wck.org.
That’s his charity. And we’ll be talking everything
that he’s going on. I think he’s going to be
in his kitchen. I want to quickly first give
a congrats to our pal. I don’t know if you can
see it here. Kamal.
Kamal had a baby boy. -Kamal, whoo-hoo!
-Kamal, we love you, guys! -We love you!
-Oh, my gosh! Congratulations
to the whole fam. Beautiful baby boy. That’s the best news ever, man. A baby just makes everyone
happy. So that is awesome, buddy.
I miss you so much, Kamal. I miss everyone in The Roots. In fact, we got together
and — through Zoom and technology — and made a little song
because right now I think everyone feels
like we’re a little stuck in the middle. Please enjoy. -One, two, three, hit it. ♪♪ ♪♪ -♪ Well, I don’t know
why I came here tonight ♪ ♪ I got the feeling that
something ain’t right ♪ ♪ I’m so scared in case
I fall off my chair ♪ ♪ And I wonder how
I’ll get down the stairs ♪ ♪ Clowns to the left of me,
jokers to the right ♪ ♪ Here I am, stuck in
the middle with you ♪ ♪ Yes, I’m stuck in the
middle with you ♪ ♪ And I’m wondering
what it is I should do ♪ ♪ It’s so hard to keep
a smile on my face ♪ ♪ Losing control,
I’m all over the place ♪ ♪ Clowns to the left of me,
jokers to the right ♪ ♪ Here I am, stuck in
the middle with you ♪ ♪ Well, you started out
with nothing ♪ ♪ And you’re proud that
you’re a self-made man ♪ ♪♪ ♪ And your friends
they all come crawling ♪ ♪ Slap you on the back
and say ♪ ♪ Please ♪
♪♪ ♪ Please ♪ ♪♪ ♪ Well, I’m trying to make
some sense of it all ♪ ♪ But I can see it makes
no sense at all ♪ ♪ Is it cool to go to sleep
on the floor ♪ ♪ No, don’t think I can
take anymore ♪ ♪ There are clowns
to the left of me ♪ ♪ Jokers to the right
Here I am ♪ ♪ Stuck in the middle
with you ♪ ♪ Yes, I’m stuck in the
middle with you ♪ ♪ Here I am, stuck
in the middle with you ♪ ♪ ‘Cause I’m ♪ ♪ Stuck in the middle
with you ♪ [ Song ends ] [ Applause ] ♪♪ -Hi, everybody.
Welcome back to “The Tonight Show:
At Home Edition.” Today is Friday, and that’s
usually when I, you know, check my inbox,
return some emails. And, of course, I send out
thank-you notes. And I have my buddies here
helping me out today. So I’d like to write out some
thank-you notes right now. If that’s okay with you.
-[ Fusses ] -Okay, buddy. Frances — -[ Fussing ] Okay, Frances, you know
your job, right? ♪♪ -Thank you, showers, for once being a routine
part of my day and now feeling like
a major accomplishment. ♪♪ [ Boos ] [ Laughs ] -[ Giggles ]
-Um… [ Boos ] Thank you,
getting food delivery, for suddenly making me feel
like I’m a spy intercepting an elaborate drop. “The hamburgers are
in the hole.” [ Boos ] “I repeat, the hamburgers
are in the hole.” [ Boos ] All right. Just press
the purple one. That’s good. ♪♪
[ Boos ] Thank you, journals, for now
reading less like a diary and more like a captain’s log after being lost at sea.
[ Boos ] All right. Here we go.
Just the purple one. Just this one.
-I got that. -Yep.
-[ Giggles ] ♪♪ -Thank you, socks,
for being the new shoes. You can pick up that one now. ♪♪ -[ Shouting ] ♪♪ -Who is that?
-Just a stranger. [ Laughs ] ♪♪ Thank you, journals, for now reading less like
a diary and more like a captain’s log after
being lost at sea. [ Drumming,
light laughter ] [ Drumming ] That’s good.
You can go to the next one. [ Drumming ]
♪♪ -It’s definitely Friday
around here. ♪♪ -Thank you, making shows from
home, for making me feel like I got a promotion from
talk show host to YouTube star. Don’t forget to smash
that like button. Next one. Thank you, couch,
for really stepping up during this difficult time
to become a desk, table, bed, bookshelf,
and trash can. Next one. ♪♪ Thank you, Dr. Anthony Fauci
listening to Trump, for looking like me
when someone suggests a 9:00 A.M. Zoom meeting. ♪♪ [ Murmurs ] ♪♪ Thank you, 40-minute limit
on free Zoom software. Seriously, thank you,
thank you, thank you. 40 minutes is enough. That’s good. Thank you, “welp,” for being the official slogan
of wrapping up a phone call during quarantine. Come on. ♪♪ Thank you,
virtual happy hours, for being a great rebranding
for drinking alone. ♪♪ And that’s our thank-you notes
right there. Thank you to Winnie.
Thank you to Frannie. And thank you to my wife
for operating this camera. We’ll be right back with
Tina Fey, everybody. ♪♪ -I got to catch up with one
of my favorite people today. From her apartment in Manhattan,
here is Tina Fey. Tina Fey, welcome to “The
Tonight Show at Home Edition.” I love you, buddy.
You’re looking great. Thank you so much
for doing this. I appreciate it so much.
-It’s my pleasure, pal. It’s good to see you.
-Great to see you, as well. And where are you?
Are you in Manhattan still? -I’m in Manhattan. We’re holed up in our apartment
here in New York City. And so far, so good. We’re doing what
we’re supposed to do. -How are the girls?
-They’re doing pretty well. They didn’t like
going outside anyway, so… -This is kind of
perfect for them. -We’re dragging them outside,
and they’re like, “Or… stay in here and play
all the screens that we want?” I’m like, “Fair enough.” -Your kids are pretty creative
from what I know. I heard that they were —
They thought of an interesting way
to have dinner at your house? -Yes, this was awesome, and
I wanted to tell you about it because I feel like
it’s something you can do — anyone can do at home
if they’re trying to fill time. My older daughter, Alice,
is 14 now, and she saw this idea online, so thank you to whoever put
this idea online originally. But she was saying, like,
we should do theme dinners. And we did one the other night, and it was
an airplane-themed dinner. And the thing
that was great about it was it took a lot of time,
right, for them to get ready. Also, I don’t know
if your girls are this way, but Alice was actually kind of
helping her little sister get ready for it, and the
little sister is just, like, so pumper when her big sister
pays attention to her at all. -Oh, yeah.
-She was just, like, pumped. And they dressed up like — Penelope dressed up
like a stewardess. Here. Let me find these
pictures. I’ll show them to you. It was really cute. Um… -That is hilarious. -She dressed up
like a stewardess. They did the whole like — I don’t know
if you can hear this. Like, a whole safety, uh… -…your chair.
If you lose air… -So cute. -…the air masks will fall
from the cabin above. -The whole safety thing.
[ Laughs ] -Oh, my gosh! -They turned all the chairs. They were like —
I’m getting a text. There were magazines
in the back of the chairs. -[ Laughs ] That is brilliant!
-They had — We had dinner. They — They served it on, like, big old trays,
which was good. My husband made — We had — well, we had macaroni
and cheese and spam, but it was on the trays.
-[ Laughs ] -And then also they were —
Because they were treating us like a really nice flight,
they were like, “Would you like
a glass of wine?” And we were like, “Yes.” And the great thing was,
afterwards, they were like, “We didn’t know
how much wine was too much.” And I was like, “Yeah, you
didn’t, ’cause this was…” -Yeah! That’s what
I’m talking about! -An ample first-class pour. -I want them at my dinner party. -She put an airplane window
on our TV, and I wore a sleep mask, and for the next 18 months,
that’s me. -[ Laughs ] -That’s Quaran-Tina. -[ Laughs ]
-Ooh, that’s pretty good. -Oh, also, by the way,
the last thing I’ll say about airplane dinner —
the other reason to do it is once your seat belts
are on and everything’s done, the dinner part is everyone
sitting quietly. If you have enough phones, everyone watching a movie
on their own device. -Genius. -It will be the quietest dinner. [ Laughter ] -It is absolutely genius.
-It’s great. Thank you to the Internet
for that. Yeah, the other thing that
we did, which was super fun — we did a thing — We did an online talent show
with my — our kids, a bunch of us,
over this very technology. We used Zoom, and so if you
have a Zoom work account, you should definitely abuse it
and use it for other things. So it was, like, my ladies,
Maya Rudolph’s kids, Amy Poehler, Emily Spivey,
Ana Gasteyer’s kids, and we — Again, another thing
that was nice about it was it took about a week. We were sort of like,
“Guys, probably this weekend, probably there’s a talent show, so you need to think about
what you’re going to do.” So there’d be times where
I would be screaming, like, “Get off of your screens! Go
practice for the talent show.” And it would kind of work. -Wow.
-So everyone really brought it, and then the other thing
that was super cute was we realized kind of like
in the half hour before that we could probably
get links to all — as many as we could
of the grandparents. And so right when
we went to do it, it was like —
My mom was able to get on. Amy’s parents. Emily Spivey’s parents
in North Carolina. And it was so cute. Shoemaker watched it from…
-No way! -“I’ll watch it.
I have nothing to do.” Friends of mine in Florida. And so everyone —
It was so sweet to see everyone, like, come together on the Zoom. And Archie Arnett —
Amy’s son Archie was the host. He did an awesome job. Rome Spivey did —
He did a sketch that was an old Emily Spivey
cut-for-time sketch about, like, an ad
for a barbecue place, and it was like, “Come
on down to our barbecue.” And he committed.
It was so cute. Ulysses McKittrick
did close-up magic. -No way.
-Penelope did — Penelope is using this time
to practice contortionism ’cause she’s —
‘Cause why wouldn’t she? Why wouldn’t she find a way to
make us nervous the whole time? So she does some, like — [ Laughter ] And the first 27 minutes — I recorded the whole thing. The first 27 minutes
of the one-hour thing is just old people not understanding
when they’re muted. -[ Laughs ] -It’s, like, Emily Spivey’s dad
being like, “Oh, I don’t know.
I think they started.” And then it’s like —
-“Are we on yet? Are we on yet?” -Mr. Poehler just like… It was the best,
and if anyone — If you have the capability
to do it, it was super fun. -Oh, that’s great. I think we have a little clip we can just show
right here real quick. -This is the end of Penelope
doing her — She did some contortion to “These Boots
Are Made for Walkin’.” The audio wasn’t terrific, but you can kind of
get a feel for the vibe of the FOTS,
the First Online Talent Show. ♪♪ -Bravo! [ Applause ] -Wonderful!
-Good job. [ Indistinct shouting ] -Yay. That was fantastic. Tell Penelope I said
she is awesome. She’s very talented.
Please tell her. I know with this whole
COVID-19 quarantine shutdown, Broadway has been shut down, and your show, “Mean Girls,”
is currently off. How is everyone doing
and dealing over there? -Yes. I mean, that was hard. That’s a whole huge industry.
It’s a huge part of New York. It’s a workplace
for so many people. I’ve been trying to do stuff
to help raise money for the actors fund in addition to the City Harvest stuff
we’re going to talk about today. But it’s rough because it’s —
it’s a lot of people. It’s a giant industry. But we are just all
kind of sticking together. Also our tour,–
“Mean Girls” was out on tour, and that is paused, and we look forward to,
when it’s safe to do so, hopefully adding those cities
back that we missed. But, yeah,
we had a meeting yesterday. It’s a very close-knit
community, and we just want to come out
the other side stronger. And when it’s safe to come back, we will be there,
and we will welcome you back. I hope there’s some kind of
like “I love New York” campaign, like the ’70s.
-Ohh. -We need that
when it’s safe to do so. We’ll be here and ready to… -♪ I love New York ♪ -Frank Langella
dressed like Dracula. -That’s right!
-But, you know, our “Mean Girls” Broadway,
our social channel, we’re trying
to give people content and let them check in
if they’re fans of the show. There’s always stuff
to see there. -Well, whatever we can do
to support when you come back, we will, please. -Put you in the
“I love New York” commercial. -Yeah. Exactly.
I would totally… Let’s talk about
CityHarvest.org. This is —
-Thank you. -Winnie does all these graphics. -Good work, Winnie. -Yeah. They’re getting smaller
and kind of less creative. -She’s getting tired of it?
-Yeah, she doesn’t want to work. She doesn’t like her new job.
I’m like, “Come on. Help me out a little bit,
please? Geez.” City Harvest. They’re fantastic. You’ve done stuff with them
before, haven’t you? -Yeah, I mean, I’ve just been
a donor with them before. And they’re a really
well-established charity here in New York City. I figured this problem
is so big, sometimes it feels good
to think locally. And I encourage people
to do so around the country to support organizations
near them, too. But, you know, New York City is
the epicenter of this right now. It looks calm
when you and I talk. It’s calm to see people
in their homes who are well. But there are so many people
who are in hospitals right now. There are so many people
who are toughing it out at home who are super-sick, who ordinarily would go to the
hospital, who can’t right now. And City Harvest is a charity
that gets food, healthy food to at-risk neighborhoods
and places where they don’t have great ways
to get nutritious food. And they’re currently
up and running. Their mobile markets are going. They’re still able
to be helping out. And so I think, also,
not just right now, but whenever this settles down, the economic repercussions
of this are going to be major, and there’s going to be
a lot of people, a lot of kids who count on their school meals
who are now homeschooled. There’s going to be a lot
of people who are in need of their services,
and I really encourage — I thank you for inviting me
to talk about it, and I encourage people
to donate. -These people are angels
that are helping everyone out. And right now,
if anyone’s watching on YouTube, there’s a “donate” button
next to it. So just click that button,
and you’ll donate. Anything matters. Everything. Just give a dollar.
Give 50 cents. It’s — I can’t even stress
how awesome that is that we can just do that,
and it will feed so many people. You have no idea. So thank you.
This is a great charity. Thank you so much
for doing this. I really appreciate it. And on behalf of everyone
watching the show, they all appreciate it, too,
so thank you. While we’re all quarantined
and cooped up at home. I’d like to play a game
based on a board game that you can actually play
called — Uh-oh. -Probably — I told you
there’s a Japanese water ghost in my house. -What is going —
-My house is pretty haunted, and just sometimes — Sometimes a specter — You can’t even quite —
Oh, there — Oh, gosh! -Wow! -Oh, gosh.
-Oh, my gosh. That’s freaky! -Help me!
-Hey! I don’t see anything, Tina.
I think you’re just — -Do you want to show…? -[ Laughs ] -Aww. Hi, cutie. That was a good — [ Laughs ]
That was a good bit. -She has a history
of being creepy around you. -She does, but all funny stuff
and creative stuff. -She came…one time,
and she drew, like, really creepy, scary pictures
and left them. Um… -It was, like, dead birds
and stuff, right? -She’s — It’s fine.
She’s a Wednesday Addams. -I love her. Oh, dude. Winnie’s
obsessed with Wednesday. All right. So, we’re
going to play this game. It’s something I saw on the
Internet, but it’s a board game. It’s called “Hey Robot,”
and what it is, is I have a bunch
of random words in a jar. And I’m going to pick one out, and then you have to ask Alexa,
which is right here, or whatever speaker
you have in your house — You have to say something to get
the robot to guess the word. You can’t say the word,
but you understand the idea. It’s like “Taboo” and all that.
-“Password” and all that. -Yeah.
-I have such a wimpy voice that sometimes
even in my own house, the Alexa ignores me,
so I’ll do my best. Sometimes I’ll be like,
“Alexa, set a timer.” And she’s just like… Like, “Alexa!” -[ Laughs ]
Slap it. Clapping. “Hey, Alexa! I asked you!”
All right. Ready? Here’s your first word. -Okay, so, the funny thing is I have to take my glasses off
to see better. -Oh, I’m getting there, too.
All right. -Oh, gosh.
-It is “pickle.” -Okay. Oh, gosh. -Let me know when you’re ready,
and I’ll press the Alexa button. -Um… Oh — Uh — Sure.
I mean, press it whenever. -All right. Here we go. Ready?
-Okay. [ Beep ] -Alexa, what’s a recipe for salted, marinated cucumbers? [ Beep ] -Okay.
For salted marinated cucumbers, I recommend marinated cucumber,
onion, and tomato salad. 2 hours, 15 minutes to make.
What would you like? Start recipe,
send it to your phone, or hear next recipe. -Oh. It’s your turn. All right. -Alexa, stop.
All right. Here we go. I’m going to — Oh, I know. Alexa, what does Vlasic make? [ Beep ] -Here’s something
I found on the Web. According to wikipedia.org,
Vlasic pickles is an… -Yeah! That counts! [ Laughs ] All right. Alexa, stop.
All right. Here we go.
Now let’s try another one here. [ Beep ] Uh-oh. “Saxophone.” -Okay. Ready?
-Yep. -Alexa. Alexa. What instrument
does Bill Clinton play? [ Beep ] See? They can never hear me. -She couldn’t hear you. -No, it’s my weird ghost voice! -That’s weird. [ Laughs ] -Am I not real?
Have I never been — Am I —
Have I always been the…? Okay.
-Try it again. Ready? Here we go. -Alexa, what instrument
does Bill Clinton play? [ Beep ]
First thing out of the gate! That is the best one yet! Crusher. Yes. All right.
-Thanks for your feedback. -All right. Cool. Very polite. All right. That was killer. Oh, my God.
That was the first — That was the first word
she said. You probably get bonus points
for that. I’ll give it to you.
-Okay. -Okay. Here’s my word.
Oh, man. Unicorn. Gosh. I have no idea. Um, um, unicorn. Unicorn. Um, oh, God. I’m going to
come off as an idiot here. Um… Alexa, what do you call
a horse with a horn? -According to an Amazon
customer, unicorn. -Yes!
I love Amazon customers! “According to an Amazon
customer, a unicorn.” -Think about that. They searched all of Amazon’s
customer comments that fast? -Wow. That is bizarre.
All right. Here we go. Your word is…
-Mm-hmm. Okay. -…”cowboy.” -Hmm. That’s — Okay. Uh… What is — Alexa,
what is the name of the job — -Alexa is me. I’m a virtual assistant who can
help you with lots of things. …alarms, weather reports… -Alexa. Alexa, stop. Stop.
-Alexa. -Oh, my God. Change your voice.
Maybe British accent, maybe? -[ British accent]
Alexa, what kind of doll is Woody from “Toy Story”? -[ British accent]
Alexa, what kind of doll is Woody from “Toy Story”? -Here’s something
I found on the Web. According to
OrlandoSentinel.com, Andy’s favorite is Woody,
an old-fashioned cowboy doll. -Yes!
-…toys. -For the win. Tina Fey.
That was worth 10,000 points. You are the champ
of “Ask Robot.” I love you, bud. Oh, my gosh. [ “Don’t Fear the Reaper”
playing ] It’s playing music.
This is crazy. -“Don’t Fear the Reaper.”
-[ Laughs ] Oh, my gosh! This is weird, right?
All right. Hey, pal, I’ll talk to you — I’ll talk to you
later this week or something. Thank you so much.
I appreciate it. Bye, buddy.
-Bye, pal. -Chef José Andrés is
nothing short of an angel. I love this guy
and what he’s doing. I got to talk to him today
in his kitchen. Please watch. Oh, that’s what
I’m talking about. Chef, my chef. Oh! That’s what
I’m talking about! -Jimmy Fallon.
-You look fantastic, buddy. I love ya. José Andrés.
-Jimmy Fallon. -You look great, buddy.
Oh, my gosh. Look — no, no, no, no,
no, no. It looks beautiful. -…my hair in San Francisco
in honor of all the nurses and doctors
that they are fighting this war. Look at it.
-Wow. I think it looks cool, buddy.
I think it looks great. Hey, I said —
last time I saw you, I said I won’t talk to you again until you’re on the cover
of “Time” magazine. And here we are. Come on, look at you. Cover boy.
-Yeah, I’m — I’m very humbled by it,
but it’s kind of — World Central Kitchen
is not about I the person, and you know it.
-I know. -The kitchen is about thousands
of women and men, right now in more than ten
different missions across the world, that they only have
one thing in their head, to feed anybody that is
hungry after an emergency. So that cover is
little bit unfair because it’s not
really about José. It’s about those men and women that are making it happen
every single day. So for me to them,
that’s their cover. -Absolutely.
World — worldcentralkitchen.org
is the website just so everybody
can see that. My daughter draws these up. -Wow.
-That’s not my handwriting. Yeah, she’s getting really good. -Are you paying her?
-[ Laughs ] She’s underpaid right now,
yeah. No, I’m not.
I should. I don’t want her to hear that. But what are you
making right there? -Well, I have my favorite things
in the whole world. We’re making a fried rice. -Oh, I love fried rice. -And this is a fried rice
almost in the honor of the men and women of China that they’ve been going through
this crazy mayhem with the coronavirus. And I know that people in China
are going to be upset that this
is not the real fried rice, but it’s my fried rice,
so I ask for forgiveness. [ Laughter ] And I think it’s a lot
of families right now that they’re going through
some uncertainty. Many, many people
are losing their jobs. And there’s going to be
hard times. But I think out
of the hard times we should be taking
the best out of them. And I think this is a moment
to be saying, “Man, if I have to be home and
I have to cook for the family, what I can do?” And this is all the vegetables
that you can think of. They’re super inexpensive. Carrots. You can be using canned corn. You can be using chickpeas
and green beans. -Hey, speaking of chickpeas —
-You chop it, and then you make a fried rice. -And just put — just
throw it in with a little oil? -Look at it.
A little bit of oil. I have ginger. But if you don’t have ginger
because it’s very fancy, put garlic. It’s okay.
You know, recipes are for you to do
whatever you want with them. Don’t follow the recipe. You need to write
your own recipe for success. So if you have ginger, put it.
If not, garlic. If you don’t have ginger
or garlic, you know what? You don’t put it. And then you begin adding
any vegetable you want. Hey, are you going to
help me or what? -Yes.
-Look, my daughter Carlota, Jimmy.
-Hello. -Hi, buddy.
Nice to see you again. -You too.
-My daughter, Lucia. -Hi.
-Oh, come on. -The vegetables.
Start adding and start moving. -You have the best two chefs. -You have a lot of —
and you start cooking. Can you smell it in your house? -Yes, I’m smelling it
already through this. I cannot see it. And you keep adding vegetables.
Hominy. I’m not going to give you
a recipe. If you like vegetables a lot,
put a lot. If not, put less. I can do something now,
you see? You can add some chickpeas
because cans are good… -Yes. -…when you’re at home
for long periods. -I have a lot of chickpeas
at my house. -Some corn.
Why? Because canned
vegetables are good. -They are.
-I’m French, but if you don’t have —
canned vegetables are excellent. Actually, they need love. They feel sometimes like
we’re shaming them. [ Laughter ] Vegetables in a can,
they have feelings too. -Oh, my gosh.
-Look at how beautiful they are. -Oh, my gosh, you guys.
-Look at this great — -You guys, you can get
your dad out of there. -They have feelings. The poor chickpea.
-Oh, my gosh. -They always say,
“Why people think like we’re not good people?
We’re good people.” -How do you live with this guy? How do you live with this guy
in your house? -I don’t know.
-I don’t know. [ Laughter ] -Oh, my gosh.
-Take a look. I know this is
an expensive machine and not everybody has it, but this is a machine
that makes rice. And when it’s ready,
it’s going to sing. -Really?
-I love — When I come home, I put the rice machine
up and running. It’s back there. And then when the rice is done,
it plays a song. -Really? [ Vocalizes “Twinkle,
Twinkle, Little Star” ] -No. But it plays a song. Look, it’s about to happen.
It’s one minute away. -One minute away.
All right. Do you have a tip
for making rice, by the way? Is it like — do you put your — how do you measure
rice with water? -I use that one because I like to make Japanese rice
and it’s more sophisticated. But between you and me,
you only need a pot. Listen!
[ Music chiming ] -It’s not loud enough.
-Doesn’t matter. You cannot hear it,
but I love it. It’s like —
-I’m dancing. I’m dancing.
I love it. I’m happy. -The rice is ready. -Oh, my gosh.
-Look at it. -Come on. -And then we put
the rice inside. -Look at this.
-Okay? So a little bit more.
A little bit more. Now sautee.
Look at it. -Oh, my gosh. Guys, get out of the way.
Get out of the way. There’s more fire.
Oh, my gosh. -Move, move, move.
-Ah! -Keep away.
-[ Laughs ] Oh, my — You’re going to
light the house on fire. -And then some soy sauce.
Why? Because soy sauce
is good for you. It gives flavor.
It gives salt. And then if you have some
leftover chicken, you add it. If you have some leftover
chorizo, you add it. If not, you don’t
add anything else. By the way,
I have a question for him. What is your favorite
kitchen gadget? -Oh, I brought it. I think it’s pretty interesting
but let me show it to you and see —
do you see this? -[ Laughs ] -Keep your daughter —
see this thing? -Is this to change
your lightbulbs? [ Laughter ] -What do you guys think it is?
-Is that a whisk? -That’s a whisker
for egg whites. -It kind of is. But, no,
you’re going to freak out. This is amazing.
So my father-in-law would find these things
in antique stores and refurbish them
and refinish them. This thing right here
is a hand mixer. Check this out. This is before electricity,
okay? So you see the grooves there?
Watch this. You take a bowl.
You push. -Oh!
-Oh! [ Hums fanfare ]
♪ Bum, bum, bum… ♪ -Isn’t that cool? -Fun.
-Isn’t that fun? -That’s so cool! -You can make egg whites
with it, whipped cream probably.
-Yep. -Or you can do anything else. -Yeah, that’s — I just
thought it was so rad. I didn’t know what it was,
but it does that. -You can do my…
-No electricity. …with it, probably.
-No electricity. And I can — yeah,
I can twirl my hair with it too. [ Laughter ]
-And that’s good for mustache. I’m sure you can play music. We know you like music.
-Oh, you know that. We’ve jammed out
a couple times. -You know what
my daughters and I — we’ve have been doing
at home some nights when I come back
from working around the city? -What? -We’ve been doing recipes at the rhythm of “Hamilton.” So we put the “Hamilton”
with permission of Lin-Manuel Miranda,
and then we start cooking, and we have to cook
in the same length as the song. -Oh, that’s a brilliant idea.
I was going to ask you if we can get into a little bit
about World Central Kitchen just so we can talk about it. What are you guys up
to right now? I know that you’re
feeding people quarantined on cruise ships. You’re feeding kids
school lunches. You donated N95 masks
to hospital workers. -We’ve been doing projects
on our own. We are in many cities,
many states. In others, we’re partnering. In others, we’re giving ideas to
very good people, men and women that they are
feeding food banks. They’re doing an amazing work. The school districts
all across America, they’re doing an amazing work
keeping children fed. The best of America
shows up in these times. And food, we are here only to be
supporting the men and women that they’re fighting this war
in the hospitals of America. Those men and women,
they need all of our support. So if I ask the cooks,
we can make sure that anybody hungry can have a bite of food
and that’s going to be a part of the solution,
not part of the problem. That’s what the food people
of America, we are here to do so that men and women —
-[ Indistinct talking ] The men and women
of World Central Kitchen — Oh, oh! Oh! The [indistinct] are
popping up all around the house. So the men and women
of World Central Kitchen, we’re here to support. If you go to wck.org, there you are going to see
what we are doing, the maps where we are cooking, and where other people
are doing. So to all the food people
of America, the woman that is working
in the supermarket eight hours a day making sure
that your family is fed, that woman is also a hero. The men and women that they are
bringing the food to the supermarkets from
different parts of America, those are heroes. It’s many people that we are
going to be playing our role to make sure that America
is taken care of while we are asking America
to stay home. To those men and women
beyond our nurses and doctors, we know they’re heroes. That adds to our part
of supporting their efforts. A big kiss to you.
Big thumb-up because you are amazing people
and we love you, and when this passes,
we’re going to make sure that every man in woman
in America is recognized for their
service to this country. -I totally agree with you.
I love that. How can people at home help? -Listen, there’s many ways we
can be helping and you know it. Obviously wck.org. You know, we are feeding
from children to elderly. If you want to support us,
it’s great. But sometimes if you cannot
because times are getting hard, there’s many ways
you can be supporting. If your mayor, if your senators
and congressmen, if your governor is telling you
to stay home, stay home. This is a great way to be
helping our nurses and our doctors
to fight this virus. We want to make sure
that the hospitals are not full of people. If they’re telling you
to follow — to wash your hands 20,
30 seconds, do it because this way
you’re not spreading the virus. It’s not a joke.
This is serious times. Follow the rules.
Follow the people that know. Follow Dr. Fauci, who is an amazing hero
in these times. -Isn’t he great?
-That’s what we need to do. Listen to him.
Don’t listen to anybody else. Dr. Fauci is the leader
we need. He’s the leader we want. And we need to follow
what he’s telling us. We need to follow those people
that are telling us this is a problem
but if we do what we have to do, this problem is
going to go away. So that’s what people
can be doing at home. Sometimes
just following the rules. -Chef, what can we do? You know, I love my restaurants
and I love my chefs. I love my servers. I want to support them
in any way I possibly can. I feel so bad that, you know, but I understand you can’t
go out to dinner there. But what can I do?
What can we do? -We talking there’s
millions and millions of food service professionals — cooks, waiters, farmers,
delivery guys. And I believe that
in these hard times we all need to recognize,
obviously, if you have — if you can be supporting
your local restaurant, many restaurants,
they have employee funds that they are
collecting money from guests. Me, I was able to be very lucky
with my partners, but I understand not
every restaurant can do that because restaurants, they have
sometimes very short profits. I’ve been able to offer
four weeks, full benefits, and full salary
to every single front and back of the house,
every single member. And if I can, I’m going to do
two more weeks at least. But other people cannot. So we need to make sure that as
Congress is passing these bills, it’s going to be other bills. And we need to make sure that
we are protecting the people, the small businesses beyond
we protect anybody else. -Yeah.
-‘Cause restaurant industry, 90-plus percent of the dollar you pay to a restaurant trickles
down across America. -Every single thing you do
from Instagram, from whatever, even hanging out
and meeting your family, your awesome family, you just
keep spreading that energy and that love and that spirit
because it comes through. And we need it right now.
And we need you. And you’re the greatest.
I love you. Thank you so much
for doing my show, buddy. The best. -Feed America. We need to remember that
because there’s many that are working
right now on the farms, and they are not recognized
by our system. They’re undocumented and those
are many of the men and women who are going to keep
putting food on our tables. When all this is over,
I hope Congress will recognize that once and for all and make sure
that we pass immigration reform because these are the men
and women that are going to be
feeding America during these next few weeks. Let’s make that happen. -We love you, Chef.
Thank you so much. Thank you again.
I’ll talk to you soon. Thank you.
-Good night. ♪♪ -Thank you guys so much
for watching the show. cityharvest.org. wck.org. My thanks to Tina Fey
and Chef José Andrés. Really, thank you guys
for watching this whole week. This is what the week
has felt like. Exactly — this exact thing. Okay.
Stay safe. Take care of each other. Wash your hands.
Don’t touch your face. I’ll see next week
with all new shows. I love you guys.
Thank you so much. Oh, my gosh. -Save yourself.
-You can’t go with me. Bye! ♪♪