The Terrifying First Space Walk (feat. Adam Devine & Blake Anderson) – Drunk History


– Hello, I’m Kyle Kinane. and we’re going to talk
about the first space walk.1965!
Space race underway!
America against Russia.So Russia, they’ve been
sending animals out.
Poo!But then, the U.S.,Pew!And then, Russia is just like,Who’s the most maniac
Russian we have? Pavel Belyayev and
Alexey Leonov.So Russia says,
Pavel, Alexey, do you want to do
some ape-[bleep] stuff? [burps] We’d like you to be
the first human beings to do a spacewalk. EVA:
Electorally– Extra-Vehicular Activity. Imagine what it’s like to be
floating around in the ’80s, except this is the ’60s.And they go,What do you got
going on with your life? Nothing. Same here. Uh, yes, yes, I’ll do it. The mission’s
called the Voskhod 2,and so Russia’s watching on TV.Finally, Russia’s got
something awesome. Good luck with
your rock ‘n’ roll and your Beach Boys! We got this. So the launch–
it pops off, man.The launch pops off.
It’s good.
And so, they’re like,
We did it! We’re in orbit.Leonov pressurizes his suit,and then leaves the airlock.I’m floating in space!
I’m floating in space! It’s the best thing
I ever did in my life.He’s the first human being
to do something.
Everybody’s watching TV,
this guy’s out there,
the whole country’s,
Oh! We did it! We’re the best.The First Secretary, Brezhnev,
is like,
Leonov, good job. [blows out air] Don’t worry, don’t worry.So Leonov’s like,
Okay, I did it. Can I get back into
this craft? Oh, I can’t even fit
inside of it, because the suit
blew up too big. He’s got–filled!
It’s filled! The suit’s–
[blows raspberry]Filled up.
He’s stuck.
He’s like,Oh, I [bleep] up
this whole thing.So they cut the feed.They immediately cut to
Mozart’s “Requiem,”
which is some depressing
funeral jam. – [laughs] – I’m–I’m assuming right now
you’ll play it, right now.[Mozart’s “Requiem” plays]And it’s just some sad [bleep].♪ ♪But then,
Leonov secretly real–
he can real–
he can–he found a nozzle,
so he had to–
[imitates air sputtering out]to depressurize.And his temperature–
his temperature spikes.
He’s almost got the bends.He nearly kills himself,just to get back inside
to the spacecraft.
He’s in!
That should be the most of it.He’s in,
and then,
they can’t get
the hatch closed.
Like noth–
like, sitcom style,nothing’s going to go right
for these guys.
Aw, [bleep]. Why am I looking at this one– Should I be looking
at anywhere else other than this
one point on the couch? – [chuckles]– So–so anyway,
they fix the hatch.
Great, fine, great.But that throws the balance off
on the whole goddamn machine,
so they’re stuck
twirling around.
So Leonov says to Pavel,Like, we gotta land this
right [bleep] now.They’re trying
to figure it out.
They’re trying to calculate
the trajectory to get back,
just land on Russian soil. If we land,
and we land in China, that’ll be [bleep] up, because of…something
that Wikipedia tells us.They twirl towards the Earth,and then wait, whoa, whoa…Kaboof.
We landed. Oh, man, we should
get out of this capsule. Ah, oh, we got–
Oh, we got– We can’t get out–we can’t
get out of this capsule!” We should blow the doors! How? With these tiny explosives
we’re provided with.[imitates small explosion]Oh, good, we’re out. Oh, where are we? Oh, we’re in the tundra. – Oh, don’t do that,
don’t do that. – I know.
I know how TV works.All right, they land 2,000
kilometers off their mark,
in Siberia,which is a real place…In the middle of mating season
for wolves and bears.
It’s below-zero temperatures,
wolves, bears,
all with just boners.– Jesus.
– Lookin’ to [bleep]. – [laughs] –And all they can say
to each other is,
Well, I guess… we should start… with some sweet kisses.[both laugh]– what–how much more– – Well, what happened
to them after– – Der–Derek, don’t say nothing. – Yeah, I just want
to get what– – It’s–they’re in Siberia.They’re blasting flares out.
Ptoo! Ptoo!
They don’t even have food,or Sprites.And then, after 30 hours,they fi– [bottle thuds]
Finally they got rescued.[triumphant music]♪ ♪You wouldn’t even
believe it. – [chuckles]
– Oh! They’re just some lunatics that
said “yes” to an experiment. Cosmonauts, astronauts,
any kind of ‘naut. Did, yes.
The ‘nauts yessed. The ‘nauts said, “Why not?” – [laughs]
– Where da–where da– Where da button?
Where da button?

Comments 100

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *