The Instagrabbing of /r/dankmemes


boys get your hazmat suits and art
appreciation it’s on you to tell this one we’re going to our dankmemes a home for great works of art brilliant
feats of creativity the pinnacle of that which represents the human condition no
no don’t touch you become retired too but there’s a
problem content is being stolen stolen stolen
stolen my god stolen but who was doing the stolen
could it have been Facebook was it Twitter is 9gag at it again scientists
at the science lab did their analysis my god it was Instagram all along they were
stealing the hard work of redditors and posting it on their own Instagram
profiles in reaction snarky post cropped up all over the sovereign WTO but the
question is why would Instagram do it why why wha well that was simple money
and internet street cred while the people on reddit were working hard for
up firts the Chad’s from Instagram would stroll in take the hottest toppest
content and repost it for likes and follows many of these stolen means theft
accounts were growing to hundreds of thousands of followers and once large
enough could call up sponsors mush mush and sure enough they were livin it up
easy on fat bread stack Street off the backs of reddit the reddit has looked at
Instagram then back at their up points and gold stickers and decided that
something had to change they had to put a stop to the instagramers stop right
there criminal scum and confiscating your stolen goods they went to war the good fight started with some whining
and complaining other subreddits true ending on the complaining – it was
extremely ineffective so they tried asking the mods for help but as usual
they were too busy so they tried petitioning Instagram no they realized
they needed to scheme harder first idea guys let’s just stop making
meat then there’ll be no content to steal no good then we’ll have to find
something to do on a Friday night how about a jump in there masturbate sick a
night they threaten to unlike the egg but they couldn’t do that because
blackmail is highly illegal third idea start rotating the images that’ll be
pretty inconvenient but the Instagram thieves found a cunning workaround
finally a good one let’s stretch everything out really long Instagram has
strict criteria on height to width ratios so everything will ladened up
either way too zoomed out to read or bits will be cut off bonus points for
putting the punchline of the very top or bottom this kind of work but the idea
was cancelled when it proved too annoying for reddit as well eventually they stumbled upon the
greatest and most obvious idea watermarks it needed to be direct with a
pang of ironic cringe and most of all really obnoxious at first the results
were phenomenal and a few Instagram accounts were even publishing images
with the watermark still on them and being called out in response
instagramers started cropping out the watermarks and in fact the Instagram is
one up they created a website that automatically removed the watermarks
outrageous so again reddit got to thinking if a
static watermark is too easily removed how about a moving one although not
everyone could make these gifts and instagramers could still just take a
screenshot anyway fine try taking a screenshot of this but this idea failed
to the seizures just weren’t worth it fine how about a mess of watermark that
covers the whole thing you like that but they remove those two bucket how about
no transparency at all they said but this was also really annoying for the
subreddit then one redditor did the biggest think of them all what if we
made the means out of watermarks if they remove them then there’s no content at
all and in the meanwhile an ingenious scheme was being hatched to subvert the
online watermark removers this user made a website there purported to remove the
watermarks but actually it just added more then he added google analytics so
he could get a snapshot of who was using the site and where most of the traffic
was coming from by now if things were hitting their peak and then a little
plot twist happened is that an original meme from Instagram being published on
our dank memes did Riddick steal from Instagram wait a minute rit has been
stealing from twitter for years wait wait wait wait is everyone just stealing
from everyone else yes yes they were and with that revelation interest
quickly moved on to more pressing matters the upload button is orange no
it’s red orange red this means war Finn alright this time we’re gonna take
the patrons much more seriously oops almost forgot the end card video then
now why settle for one that’s what that’s what I always say Oh plus my
social media can’t forget that also lifeless a second channel that’s
important and today’s sponsor milk drink milk

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