The Downfall of Tony the Tiger

In 2013, the Kellogg’s® team gave Tony the Tiger his own Twitter. Surely it’ll be a great success, what could go wrong? Furries. They’re EVERYWHERE. And there are many more of them than you think. To the furries, Tony had an allure. It began with a few mild comments. Then the comments started to escalate. Then, things went completely off the rails. “Send dick pics” [Furry] Sexually harrassing Tony the Tiger on Twitter. We are, legitimately, going downhill, really fast. Of course it was all a joke. [Filthy Frank] It’s just a prank bro. Few, if any, were really fapping to Tony the Tiger. But for a children’s mascot, having fucked up shit all over your Twitter feed can be damaging. Things got worse for Tony. While he was busy being virtually raped, Finnish artist, Jani Leinonen, released a series of parody videos featuring the Frosted Flakes® icon. The subject matter of the videos were…well, all sorts of things. But none of them were very kid-friendly. The videos accumulated 2.5 million views, and they received considerable press coverage from Esquire, Adweek, Rogue Creative, and many more. With all of this bad publicity, Tony’s reputation was being tarnished. Things were about to get even worse. Mainstream media was starting to notice all the furry shit on Tony’s Twitter. They published dozens of articles, and it was a feedback loop. The more people heard about it, the more people dogpiled on. Literally. Tony was reaching boiling point, he was ready to kick some furry ass. He started laying down the cockblock. Every follower and commenter with a furry profile got blocked. The jilted lovers were left scattered and directionless. While some tried to organize a boycott, most took it as an opportunity to make a scene. They gave the controversy a name, and sent a hashtag into orbit. It was a total shitshow. But while it must have been fun to watch Twitter blow up, the furries now had no daddy. They shopped around for a little while, until they found the coolest cat of them all… Cheetos®’s Chester Cheetah. Unlike Tony, Chester played it cool. The next day, Kellogg’s® released an official press statement, but their efforts to calm the crowd had failed. Hundreds of articles were published about the incident. Tony’s downfall and the rise of Chester. It’s been a tough few months for Tony, but he still carries on. You can visit his Twitter still today. See him teach kids the value of sports and eating Frosted Flakes®… and then scroll down the comments to read a lot of fucked up shit.

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *