The game of entrepreneurship is so ugly You make one bad mistake you’re dead The business world. It’s a very mafia s type of a business If you look the other way just because you just made a million dollars in a month and you start getting very arrogant. Boom You’re wiped out If the vision is crystal clear and then you know how to sell it the rest is history I’m running a business and I’m competing in a marketplace a Five trillion dollar industry. How is that even possible for a guy like me an immigrant? I like immigrants because immigrants have a chip. They have a point to prove People that were born in America you guys have no clue what gift has been given to you Being raised in Iran. I missed the part of being playful We were in war and all we’re hearing as the whistles Not a lot of stuff throws you off at that point Self-improvement became an obsession if you’re trying to be the best version of yourself every day. That’s how I think you get to greatness It’s not about being against you. It’s about pbd against pvd’s capacity and I’m chasing this Spend some time asking the right questions from yourself ask yourself what you’re looking for From there on if you stay true to the vision the world better get out of your way They say that the human race is doomed that We have lost touch with our true nature That the media has corrupted us and that the planet has the future. I Disagree I believe that humanity is full of hope and that our salvation Lies within each one of us My name is Brian rose in my job is to listen the oldest method of learning known to man Each week I seek out individuals that are changing the world’s people who are living and thinking in a different way their stories will challenge your beliefs make you question your choices and perhaps inspire you to change I Never planned on doing any of this but now I can’t stop Join me on this mission and make humanity something we can all be proud of As the host of value tainment patrick vet david has had some unusual conversations from mob bosses to Hollywood actors to NBA players He really seeks out unusual people and gets them to tell all but he had a weird journey in getting there he was born in Iran spent time in the military and then in poverty and built himself up as a businessman and now owns a large insurance company But he really is about teaching people how to get to the next level in business and it’s all about going inside It’s about finding your limitations and your limiting behaviors and trying to correct those and push yourself to the next level I love Patrick I love what he’s about and we had a really hard conversation if you want to know what it takes to succeed in life and in London real we push people every single day in our Academy to succeed whether when they want to start a business from scratch in eight weeks Whether they want to publicly speak or they want to broadcast themselves with their own podcast. We do all of that This is a little bit more about it London real doesn’t stop when the conversation is. You see that’s when we get started Because everything begins with a thought and then comes the action The London real Academy is our global transformation platform here. We bring together thousands of students from over 75 countries Whether you want to build a profitable business from your passion or learn to speak to inspire or broadcast yourself with your very own Podcasts or accelerate your life to become a high-performance person We have the online accountability course and personal mentoring program. That will make your dream a reality Join us and we’ll take your life to the next level together Our next accelerate of course is starting soon This is London real I am Brian rose, my guest today is Patrick BETT David the creator of the YouTube channel value tainment Which takes complex leadership management and entrepreneurial ideas and converts them into simple life lessons After fleeing to America from Iran at age 10 you later joined the military and then went to work in finance before starting your own Company PHP agency’ in 2009 value tainment now has over 1 million subscribers posting interviews with a wide range of high performance people including mob bosses Hollywood actors and NBA Hall of Famers Patrick welcome to London. Yes good to be here. Great to have you first of all, how’s the city treating you? What do you think of London? What’s what’s your perspective? You know, I got to tell you when I was coming in Everybody’s like oh my gosh London, you know, they’re snobby. They’re full of themselves, etc, etc. But Nice people. I mean very pleasant, you know good restaurants great food it’s got a if-if-if London, you know It would be combination between Paris New York if Paris and New York came together and had a baby It would be something like London. Okay, so feeling like a little style a little bit of a buzz. I like it a lot I mean, I would be an understatement It’s a every year We decide to take our guys our agents to some part of the world and we go And have a good time. Like we just went to Croatia we went to Santorini and we went to Venice we went to Dubai prior to that We went to Tuscany and had a 20,000 square foot place and we brought everybody in their spouses and chefs The next one is Tahiti. This is on the list as a following one after my trip here. I’m amazed by the city Yeah, I love it You know, I was in New York for many years and you know It’s great when you’re young but it can be like super intense that place. Yes for me. This is a kinder gentler place It’s got some green space people are nice access to the continents. So yeah, you gotta come back Oh, this is definitely not gonna be the last time First of all, I want to start and just say I appreciate what you do You know because there’s not many people in this space that are going out there and putting out these long-form conversations And I know how hard it is And I always say the mark of a professional is someone who makes it look easy and you make it look easy But I know it’s not and you’re on the road putting out some pretty fantastic You know conversations that are out of the mainstream even the mainstream YouTube podcast arguments And so that’s incredible. And before we get into everything and I want to go deep into lots of stuff I was wondering first of all, I’m sure you get asked this But I want to know top three favorite guests of all time. And how do you choose a guest? That’s so top three favorite. Obviously, Michael Franzese has to be on the list because we’re very good friends now okay, like who is he for people that don’t know he is a Highest-paid mobster since Capone two billion dollars of career earnings. He was making six to eight a week reporting to Paul Castellano and Serpico and he had dealings with Gaudi he had dealings with Gravano. I mean he had dealings with everybody on the cover of Fortune magazine 1986 they had the 50 most powerful mobsters in America He was on that list the youngest on that list at 35 years old. And so that’s Michael Franzese You know, John McAfee was a creative one It was a different one because John McAfee the founder of McAfee Antivirus, right? He sent back to the mobster really quick How can he talk to you about that stuff? You know, it’s a question that everyone asked and it’s a question that I asked myself I think the reason why he can’t talk about that stuff today is because mayor Giuliani did a good job getting rid of the mob Him and Donnie, Brasco, which is aka Joe Pistone, right? Okay, right if you’ve seen a movie if you’ve seen a movie Donnie, Brasco Giuliani played the role of trying to get rid of everybody four times. He try to rest Francie’s he couldn’t do it on the last case Francie’s was on for like 50 years or hundred years some number like that and then he I’m only getting Eight years and he wanted at the time and came back and he just says I might change my life and then from that moment on a lot of people went to prison so their street credit that they had in the 80s Disappeared, okay so the mob world of New York Chicago Philadelphia today isn’t what it was in the 80s 80s was Peak 80s was they had judges bar. They had cops bah. They have chief of the police department bah that Congressmen senators bah that people at the top that you know, even in the earlier 40s that Jade Guru verba they had a lot of these guys baths and When you have things on them the powerful people you have info on them. You can you can move a lot of things today They don’t have the same pulse. So for him to talk about it. Openly there’s not really anybody in a marketplace That’s gonna do anything about it because everybody’s in their 70s and their 80s or they’re dead Ok So that then other mobsters don’t care and then the feds and the government doesn’t care to put him away so he can talk It’s not that they don’t care Some of them have called me and they call me and the phone sounds like an f-bomb for an hour I’m being that serious law enforcement in law enforcement is one but more mobsters people who are in the world of mob they’ll call me and they’ll say you know, What the story with this and I gotta tell you what this and that don’t listen They want to tell you their verse they want to tell me their version. So on camera they won’t do it No, it’s very interesting. But so once you come and talk about it, no, I’m not I’m not doing that. I’m not doing that Ok, interesting. So Michaels that part John, mcafee would be another one because mcafee you know, very very different strange kind of a personality You know, he was if if social media was around in the early 90s McAfee would be dan Bilzerian on steroids. That’s what he would have been because he was so eccentric you know, if you see some of this stuff this guy he did an anti-virus commercial snorting cocaine and With 20 prostitutes in a video. It’s a very weird and that video went viral. I mean you can go see it on YouTube So he sold a company for 100 million dollars We sat down at his house that he wouldn’t give us the address until two hours before the interview And gives us the address we go to his place Five guys, there were a 47s with m16s Nine, German Shepherds are outside the entire town with the interview He’s got a gun right here in the middle of the interview somebody You know knocks on a door guy jumps to the door with guns I’d say McAfee was Another one that was interesting. I like Pistone because the story of Donnie Brasco and being an undercover FBI agents You know, how do you go six years and play undercover in the Bonanno family? I mean you and I may be able to act for an hour, maybe five minutes, maybe a day of great actor can act for Daniel day-lewis, maybe six months lasted the Mohicans he gets him to that part. Can you imagine acting for six years? That’s what this guy did so to be able to speak to that guy and ask him and say look you’re an FBI agent Okay for six years, but you were so into deep your party and you’re having that life did you at one point turn and say, you know, you wanted that life more than being the FBI agent and he gave me the answer, but I didn’t believe him I said, I don’t know if I buy it, but he said, uh, he said um you Know no, I was always an FBI. I take a bullet for you. I take a bullet for him I take a bullet from Bob not taking a bullet for a mobster and I said You know you seem like, you know You act more like the Mafia right now there Michael Franzese does Because when you speak to Pistone if you had a sit-down right now, and you don’t know Michael Francis or Joe Pistone And I tell you have to decide who’s a mafia who was a mobster. You’ll never say Michael Franzese Hmm you also Joe Pistone was a former mob and Michael’s what more soft-spoken Unless the typical gangster you see in the movie is so soft interesting he’s so soft-spoken that tells you a lot about business – yes, and he was he was a You know He was going to be a doctor like you went and got MIT you went through with that direction of what she did yourself you know As a guy that you do crazy Nobody gets accepted and like no one and Mike you would never accept somebody like me you didn’t go on MIT You gotta be somebody this guy’s going to become a doctor Michael Franzese again or become a doctor his dad goes to prison he gets upset He goes to prison and says I’m not gonna be a doctor. That’s like what do you talk much? I’m gonna be a made man says you’re not gonna do this. Laughs He says I’m doing it that he can’t stop me and he changes From wanting to be a doctor to be anime meant to making two billion courier earnings. So that’s a very Interesting dynamic because what are you gonna do be doctor making 300 grand year while these guys are making 300 grand a week? Yeah Psychologically, that’s tough to accept. Yeah, right. It’s tempting How do you explain this fascination with the underworld the mob bosses? If you go to your website, you’ve got movies to watch which is great And you got casino American Gangster great movie, by the way. Yes, the Godfather series Casino. You know, what? What is it? Why why is that fascinating? Is it the entrepreneurship? You know, uh, I just think there’s a big element of that I think there’s a big yell. I mean I grew up My family was power place ride. My mother’s side. They were all communists And so they hated the rich people all the time, which people agree to I mean I hated rich people growing up I had an uncle who was the richest family and or a person in our family and I couldn’t Almost like they don’t like this guy because my mom hated rich people and we talked about How about rich people? My my dad said they were imperialists and Imperialists, you know, they believe poor people are lazy. So imagine rich people are greedy poor people are lazy. I mean, these are like bipolar type of a relationship And these guys are fighting all the time and we had a lot of family politics and I never liked it I never liked being bullied. I never liked being pushed around. I never liked those games at all And so that kind of put me in a position where you have to learn The games people are trying to play with You to try to pin you against somebody and if you don’t know it You’re gonna get caught up in the spiderweb and all of a sudden five years goes by saying Why didn’t I lot like you what was the issue here? And so, you know the mobsters the Mafia family, that’s the ultimate game because in the business world You know the worst thing that’s gonna happen to you is gonna be put out of business. That’s fine Okay And you’re gonna have to find a way to come back three years recover Save money make money make some good connections and recreate yourself and come back and do something in the mob world You make one bad mistake you’re dead. It’s game over So it’s the ultimate punishment you get and so if you’re willing to play in that game And you’re willing to put that as the possibility of your worst-case scenario. I want to know how that person is wired I want to know those power plays We run a business and we have a lot of enemies the bigger. We’re getting the more enemies we have people who are my good friends ten years ago, you know, I hear stuff they’re saying behind my back where I’m like Okay, this is all starting to make sense because it’s competition I get it You know you want to take market place away from you and I’m trying to make a name for myself and we’re coming up in An industry financial industry insurance industry where the average agent is a 59 year old white male and we are a 34 year old Hispanic female, that’s not normal We are a very weird company where the CEO is from Iran you what Iranian? CEO is gonna compete in a financial industry in life insurance. That’s a very political very Mafia esque type of a business. Who’s this new regime coming and taking over so how do you do without stepping on the wrong person’s toes and Respecting that guy that just wants pure respect. He’s not wanting anything from you just wants you to make sure in the rooms You respect them all those dynamics. You gotta learn obviously a lot of mistakes. I’ve made as a rookie CEO coming up, but That’s my fascination Happier workers are more than half a women more than half are rs immigrants as well Yes, like you are like I am now that’s a completely different footprint like you said than your competitors. Why why do that? Oh my gosh, are you kidding me the eyeballs of an immigrant, you know, look at the eyes of an immigrant It’s different than somebody that’s born in America I mean for me, you know I go to America and I tell him I say I speak to people in like you guys have no clue What gift has been given to you, especially people that were born in America? They don’t know any different like they’ll get into a debate and I had a big debate The other day in Argentina with this one guy and he’s just going off about how America sucks and he said he’s making 1.5 million Dollar your income. I’m like, what do you mean America sucks. I said, can you tell me another place you’ve lived for two years? No, how do you know I said so how do you know about another country? It’s like the kid who’s got a great father That’s the disciplinarian bitching to another kid who lost his father in a war What do you mean, you know about your father’s a bad person? Yeah. I wish I had your father That’s what the kids saying. So for me, it’s like I’m living in America saying are you kidding me? This country allows a guy like me, you know, one point a GPA parents divorced Street kid Goes to the army. I get out. I get this fascination to want to read books one guy believes in me and then I get obsessed and next thing, you know, I’m running a business and I’m competing in a marketplace and a Five trillion dollar industry. How is that even possible for a guy like me so that’s why I resonated with immigrants I like immigrants because immigrants have a chip and I like women in this business because women have a chip My number-one earner is a woman by the way Sheena. I like them. They’re chippy, er, they have a point to prove There’s something going on there In Saudi when women’s MMA some of the best fights out there. That’s right. They don’t have to be there They really have to push themselves to be there And if it I when I watch them, I’m just like wow, these are people that are spirited They they really they they have to prove themselves It’s so much easier to work with somebody that’s got a point to prove. You know, it’s so much easier I mean look at basketball, you know You’ve got a guy like Vince Carter he comes into the gym jumps 49 inches literally jumps out of the gym He the way he jumped in he would do dunks insanity They call him Vince sanity, right and he got a guy like Kobe Bryant that’s coming up He doesn’t jump besides the other guy does and everybody’s thinking Vince Carter’s gonna have a better career in, North Carolina You know following Jordan’s career Kobe’s got a chip on his shoulder puts his number 24 by 24 Jordans 23 You’re putting one over Jordan 24 scores 33,000 points Obviously doesn’t pass Jordan up but the chip with less talent. They didn’t have Jordans hands Lococo, B does 20 years with one team e plays there’s something very special about a controlled ship It’s very the key word. There is control right that’s been a story of your life. It’s been a story of my life because Every time the chips not been in control. I’ve screwed up and God knows I’ve screwed up so many times Oh my gosh, I’ve screwed up So many times one night ship has not been controlled which which looks like what when the chip is not control you get angry it Becomes all about you Yeah, it’s it becomes all about you and you lose perspective this is why I don’t like alcohol and this is why I don’t like drugs because I don’t your you’re not in control a Substance is doing that right and so imagine on this. Oh, I don’t drink coffee by the way drink any coffee It magnifies. It just makes it bigger. Yeah, I mean for me, you know that whole Situation of scene where I go with the rage and then I see this again I see that that rage hurts you and picture three steps back Listen, you got to control that rage, but it’s a good thing that you have this rage because if we can take this You know ninety seven octane fuel and we put it in the right engine Controlled. Oh my gosh So we need to make sure that high octane is controlled because high octane and wrong place can blow up a building Yeah And how do you go about controlling that because when I hear someone I chip on my shoulder you kind of think someone that wants To fight and then what happens is you get caught up in the fight not the result. I’m gonna beat that guy You’re not gonna say that about me and that’s a short-term thinking. Yes, how do you control that? You know, so for me? Here’s what happened and I’ll give you the perfect example. So I had this conversation with our guys deer that said look There’s nothing wrong with being very competitive I said but as Competitive as you are it’s got a limit to it. What do you mean? Let me explain to what I mean by this So it’s very good when you’re coming up and there’s competition Because someone’s making you feel inferior, so you have to step up or you flight right? You fight flight you free So oh my god, she’s better than me. I’m not gonna do anything. I can’t beat this guy and boom you just become a regular guy or You know you fly down I’m not gonna do this business, you know Whatever and secretly you’re not doing it because you know the other guys better than you, so I’m not gonna stay in this space I’m just gonna leave this space or you decide to go fight and see how you do. Okay, so if we go fight I Mean if it’s just a direct competition that you do there’s a limit Eventually, you get to a point where you say to yourself I think I can compete like we were about to shut down the channel in the first two years And we said I don’t know if this is gonna be me I don’t know if the audience resonates maybe we just don’t have it. Then we said let’s change the channel Let’s go from Patrick David to call on it value tainment. So then we change a channel to value 10 We took a complete different approach because a lot of people want a brand names I don’t want a brand name when I die. My name is only worth the legacy I want a brand a business because I can sell that business is what I it’s a complete different approach some people agree Some people don’t so I said, let’s do very tainment why we’re bringing value. We’re entertaining and there’s becoming a movement So, let’s see how this resonates then we adjust it Then it started growing then we could compete then we started growing but then it was no longer about the competition not because we’re beating the competition because PewDiePie is killing everybody 69 million subs. So if you’re really gonna compete you’re gonna get your ass handed to you So god guide the tops got 69 million. What are you gonna do to get to 60? Ml? Then maturity for me and this happened at around 33 34 35 the main main outcome became capacity That’s what it became. And I realize everyone’s capacity is different in life Your capacity may be higher in life But you became an underachiever even though you have a lot more potential than I do My capacity may be smaller in life But I become an overachiever at my smaller capacity and I do better in life You could even be an achiever and you still do get in life and you beat somebody Who let’s just say it’s not as talented. Then you’re like, let’s just say yourself. You’re an MIT guy. You’re all this W people are expecting you to win So some of the kids you went to school with if you just competed with those guys That’s like an 18 year old kid bullying a 14 year old you’re gonna beat them It’s not fair to compete there, right? So on the outside We can very easily fool ourselves into thinking we’re winning because we’re always comparing down versus if I compare to my capacity I’m striving for something else, you know, so once that ship went towards Pat’s here’s what we’re really fighting for if this is really your capacity and if you constantly look at the marketplace about competition and Eventually, let’s just say you beat a few people then what that doesn’t necessarily mean. You became Reach that level of capacity. I’m striving for this that adjustment and that mindset believe it or not helped me a better relationship with other people helped me a better relation with competitors because It’s not about me against you. It’s about pbd against pvd’s capacity and I’m chasing this and it gave a lot more. Peace joy a Comfort not in a comfortable level but comfort knowing, you know, we’re playing a different game now Yeah, some of my greatest guests on this show compete with themselves including Dorian Yates you know and he was the guy that always wanted to beat himself and I think that’s why he got to those levels cuz it wasn’t about that guy or that guy which also brings weird energy and weird results to the people around you if you’re trying to be the best version of yourself every day That’s how I think you get to greatness and that sounds like what you’re trying to do I mean Dorian HS I met Dorian Yates in 1999. Let me tell you I mean when I saw Dorian, I have a picture with him and I had Venice Beach. Okay, and you’ll see this 18-year old guy that got out of the army I was 99 a 21 year old guy that got out of the army and I’m like i’ma go be mr. Olympia it’s what I’m thinking to myself and I see Dorian Yates and that’s a perfect example of a guy that I Mean his back the way he built this back. He could pretty much fly he jumped off a building and just did a last spray that guy could probably Fly in the middle of the sky with the way he built his back Yeah, great story with door news, by the way props to on that interview. That was an Incredible interview and you were able to take that the topic deep in areas that not a lot of people take in that space and I think it was Necessary somebody needed to do it And so you spearhead that topic of steroids and growth hormone and he went there which is in respect to him as well Yeah for willing to be open about it. Yeah, it was great to have him there. We were right place right time What do they say the heart of your practice the more lucky you get yes, no, and so we were there You know right when that happened Tell me more about Value tainment because I think from the outside on the first look people see it as okay simple lessons I can learned if I want to be an entrepreneur but what I see from you is a guy going through a lot of introspection And asking people to look down deeper inside yourself and saying okay. What do I really want? What are my core values? what do I have to do to get myself out of these bad patterns to get that Ferrari to get that business and You talked about this time where you went to Malibu beach, and you ask yourself questions And I’ve never heard anyone talk about this and you’re sitting there alone Asking yourself questions and really digging deep down into your soul as a way to get you to the next level in life and business And it’s not what you’d expect from a guy trying to teach entrepreneurs. Can you talk a bit more about that? yeah, I mean it’s a It’s a ver it’s very emotional. It’s very emotional because your life is a Combination of different events you witnessed like, you know, there’s a part of it. That’s our DNA, right? Let’s you say from the moment you walk. I have my three kids from the moment. They were born Their DNA has been the same like the middle one was a charmer from day one He was a charmer like his teachers would say he was two years old I can’t discipline your son because he just gives me the smiling I have to give him what he wants. Right and my oldest ones was always a thinker and observant and very creative and he liked vampires and scaring people and he liked to talk about sharks and he liked scary movies and My young one we never told you to pick stuff up or help her brothers out or bring the shoes to me That’s the NA. I don’t think that’s like parents can take credit. Let me tell you the kind of kids I raise you know that I don’t think that’s what it is. So we have a DNA right? That’s our thumb That’s a fingerprint that we have in the world, but then outside of that there’s experiences. There’s trials There’s memories of mom and that fighting there’s words Mom said there’s words dad said there’s words a friend said there’s a breakup heartbreak setback something The teacher said us a injury in sports. You were coming up. You almost made it to the next level your knee or your back or you got knocked out publicly in front your peers and everybody saw you getting knocked out or an Embarrassing moment publicly that happened it’s still with you You’re still carrying it You know your girl left you for somebody else your husband left you your boyfriend left you all of these things We carry and we’re pretty good at acting on the outside that we have everything under control But we’re afraid of facing this so we avoid a lot of these situations so For me that one day. I got a set a set of these questions and I said I’m gonna go and address these questions I went to Malibu budget beach, right up Zuma and Matador is what it’s called a nice set and went through all these questions six hours I’m up right on the water and I tell you Brian I was like writing it down and I would go to this moment And I just I’ve never done this before and I start writing it and I start writing I look oh my gosh and just start Crying. Oh my god. Come on. Knock it off. You little cry-baby more more deeper deeper deeper Why how has this affected your life? Maybe this is the reason why you keep dating the same type of girls Maybe this is the reason why the same type people don’t get along with you Maybe this is the reason why you don’t like these types of people because this and then all of a sudden I’m looking at this Thing. Oh my gosh. If you go like this, you’re gonna be a monster kid. We got to figure this out And so then there was almost a moment of liberation saying like, you know, this is okay This is your product. This is who you are now we got to take some of this stuff and Know the trends that’s happened and be self-aware to know that the next time this happens It’s not the person’s fault. You’re looking at this person and you’re thinking this person is your ex or your mom or your dad It’s not it’s that situation. This doesn’t make it right. It just means something you experience you give the person an opportunity So it helped me go deeper in relationships rather than being it’s a very private guy Don’t let people in like most people that I would date a girl and you had no idea was with the for three years people Had no idea had a girlfriend private. I had girlfriends people wouldn’t know what sports pad up to. Who does he date? Nobody knew like one time I was with a girl in a company now We would go all the put nobody nowhere and I were together Finally all of us on one person finds that three years later. How did that happen? So how did you find out? so it was very private to me and Then that made me with the help of social media realize we’re all naked today I’m naked you’re naked. Everybody’s naked. I need five minutes to on social media to find out your political beliefs Do you like Trump? Do you like Hillary? Do you like Merkel? Do you like the Prime Minister here? Do you like? Political are you gun? Are you’re anti-gun are you you know weed legalized? It’s very easy to figure out people now this because we’re all naked I can find that if you’re married complicated relationship broken up. You know what everything is naked? So rather than trying to fight it we have to embrace it today We got to figure out a way to embrace it today And if you’re not only embarrassed of who you are in a naked world, it’s very very difficult life You’re gonna live it’s gonna be very difficult life for the rest your life Because the world’s naked any trying to cover yourself up and everybody can see you so we’re almost forced to become a little bit more Open vulnerable and say this is who we are one time. I was on a flight coming back. Oh my gosh I’m not engaged yet and They’re wondering You know, when is Pat gonna propose to it’s grown? As I’m just not right keep fighting it off. I keep my girlfriend away at that time Like now you can’t handle being a guy like me you just can’t You there’s no way in the world. It could be with a guy like me and then on one flight I write down all these and why are you pushing her away? This could actually be a good wife. This could actually be a good mother. Why are you putting I wrote all these things down? I came back and I hid it in my briefcase and One day when I’m cleaning up my briefcase. I forgot the envelope and I left it there and my wife read it So I come home and she’s crying I said, why are you crying? He said baby. I’m so sorry I I want you to know I’m I don’t want to pressure you. Don’t worry about it whenever you’re ready I’m like, what are you talking about? like what’s going on here and I see the yellow notepad paper three them folded and I’m like Please tell me you don’t read that she says no I read it and you know I’m sorry, I did this but I just was sitting there and I understand you so much better now, and I love you, baby I don’t care what happens we got them like oh my gosh So the reaction I thought it was gonna come was a complete opposite reaction It got us deeper it helped the relationship get deeper So you you need to be more up about who you are you do? Because listen if I don’t know if my marriage is gonna work out or not, you know every Body asked me so how’s your marriage consul’s and I we take it one year at a time marriage is not an easy thing It’s very difficult. It’s very complicated because you know, you got a hard time getting along with yourself Let alone I gotta get long with another person here. Are you kidding me? Got some kids in there and throw three kids in there. I mean that’s like a nuclear bomb possibly about to happen, right? So but You know best friendships best relationships. You gotta get deeper and deeper you get and more comfortable you are with you You’re upset gets bigger and you actually get a chance to enjoy the ride rather than trying to Act like somebody else the rest your life this is sue Patrick where David is I am very comfortable with who I am right and constantly examining yourself is how you try to get to the next level and you I mean You’re kind of like Jocko willing taking extreme ownership of what’s happened in your life Why do I keep attracting these women these types of business partnerships? Why do I keep getting screwed over in deals or passed over? It’s their fault and then you’re like wait a second. Maybe it’s my fault. Hmm. That’s a pretty advanced way of looking at things no doubt about it know that about it’s very hard to go there because You know I was having a conference call on my flight out to London with this couple and we were speaking and I said look This is the fourth time we’re speaking on the last two years. We’re the same things happened together the last two years I’m gonna be very gentle with the feedback. I’m gonna give you but here’s also where I’m at every single time I’ve spoken together the last three or two years when this has happened your response always been somebody else’s fault And I’m hoping you use this and this becomes the most painful experience for you or you’re finally willing to take full responsibility And we move on and so again push back push back push back push back. I said guys I can’t help you We can we need to get off the call and then there was a breakthrough. You know, what? You’re right. We messed up. Let us get better at the stuff that that I said. Okay saying it is different than doing it Let’s see what you guys are gonna do because you know you creates you work so hard to create momentum, you know And I told her I said I said I want to explain it this way I want explain it to a different woman you think about business-wise. I said think about it this way I said if You and your husband you guys have been married how many years she says this many years I said think about how many minutes in the day think about how many hours in the day? Think about how many days in your you’ve been married 10 years? Okay Imagine if your husband does everything right in this 50 thousand hours of you guys being together Okay, but just two minutes of it, he sleeps with a girl How much influence does that two minutes have over the other 50,000 hours that he’s done everything right with you. She says everything I said, that’s how it is dealing with people All it takes is two minutes to screw it up You got to realize when you’re dealing with people that two minutes You can’t just slip and say oh my gosh, you know, you’re I’m not perfect gotta forgive me I said no some of the things that you do it’s gonna hurt people You got to kind of control yourself a little bit more and she said I never thought about it That way I said so moving forward start thinking about it That way maybe you’ll treat the people you’re working with slightly different because everybody’s sensitive in their own ways Your approach has got to change fine Tell me about entrepreneurship. What do most people not even understand about entrepreneurship? What is the 20 year old out there who wants to be one not really know about what it really means to be that person It’s it’s it’s Social media makes it nicer than it is I’m gonna tell you, you know all these posts and motivation on the cars and the girls and the Ferraris and a Lambos and the planes and The Jets and by the way, here’s what you got to realize I’m all for it Like people who say we shouldn’t buy exotics, you know, I’m not enough of that mindset if you don’t like it No problem. If you do like it, no problem. I don’t judge you whatever drives you you go get it for me I Drive a four hundred six thousand dollar car because in Iran I would go to Shahs Museum and he had Rolls Royce and I said one day. I’d like to have a Rolls Royce great So we’re here. We’re talking to the Rolls Royce community. We’re doing a collaboration together with them And so I wanted to get a Rolls Royce because it connects them every time I’m in the car Shaw comes to my mind I have a painting of Shaw my wall. I like that but the game of entrepreneurship is So ugly that if people actually knew how ugly was up front very few would even do it It’s very ugly. It’s very lonely It’s very frustrating it exploits you at the highest level, you know You know in the world of business you don’t just have one or two weaknesses imagine all of a sudden one day Fifty weaknesses are exposed all at the same time and everybody tells you because it’s you who wants that? no one wants that and imagine a Game where you always have to recreate yourself or else you lose like let me put it to you this way It’s like working out, but you can’t take a day off You know how you work at at least you got like a few days off to have your you know regroup and all that stuff For the first two to five years, you know If you if you look the other way just because you just made a million dollars in a month and you start getting very cocky Or arrogant boom you’re wiped out. That’s all it takes It’s a subtle look away to get knocked out and so, you know It’s it a lot of these books self-help books that you read and segoe You got to do this and you got to do this and you got to do that They don’t touch on the ugly part of running a business now Set the ugly part aside the one part that outweighs being willing to tolerate all this pain is The fact that choices matters to you if you driven by choices if you’re driven by control if you’re driven by You know being able to choose the kind of a life you want to live that Reward is so much higher than the pain You’re gonna have to put up there you’re willing to put up with the pain because you want this because what’s the flipside? Here’s the flipside my three kids go to the same private school together. It’s very expensive. Okay, you live in a decent community You have a house with elevators and privates you can have security you can have nicer insurance nicer protection better advisers better counsellors Better money managers better attorneys better CPAs better protection all of that stuff The choice is better places to go people that you can associate with that are at your same level if not higher than you More things that you can have as choice, I’m not talking necessarily Material things choices, so if the choices and the controls that big of a motivation for you, you know You’re gonna be able to put up with the pain. But if the pains too much for you And this doesn’t really matter you’ll eventually go back to having a job So you think people are oversold right now on entrepreneurs because the social media buy tell you were oversold on everything We’re oversold on marriage. We’re oversold on having kids. We’re oversold on entrepreneurship. I am that we are oversold on having kids We are I don’t I don’t know how many 21 year olds I hear saying I feel like if I have a kid my life will change Yes, it will change maybe not for the best. You know, maybe you got to take your time I feel like I love her into Wacken sure. I lovers by getting married. I don’t know about that You know, I don’t know if today’s the time to get married at 22. I’m being very serious with you I mean look you and I you imagine being 18 years old with access to tinder Imagine being two I don’t we don’t I don’t know that I don’t know what it is to swipe all a swipe left swipe of so I’m like, oh Let’s go beer. Great. You want to go hook up what’s going back to the Carla? I mean this has become very normal. So sex has become a very a at we kissed You know, ah school. Hey, uh Yeah, three girls this week. How what did you meet him Oh tinder swipe left swipe, right? What are you talking about? So where the value of that used to be more? It’s not the same value as it is today because it’s easier access today than it was before Got a question marriage too early. You got actually asked why do you want to get married? Why do you want to have kids? Why do you want to be an entrepreneur and the answer has to be very crystal clear? it’s not just because Like I have an answer on why I wanted to have kids and I had to get very clear before I wanted to have kids Most of us have kids because everybody seven kids. So it’s what you’re supposed to do You’re supposed to get married you’re supposed to do this and I think that the the fact that what entrepreneurship you know Don’t let the lifestyle fool you I mean this is it takes a lot of work and you have to ask yourself the question are You really willing to go through it. If yes Chris, here’s the one thing I do advise to O’Brien to everybody I think everybody ought to run a part-time business affiliate marketing great Sell products on the site garage, you know whatever it is get your real estate license sell real estate on the side get an insurance license sell insurance on the side and Maintain your job and put 10 or 15 hours into now I think everybody ought to do it and can do it everybody. So but the world of entrepreneurs Multi-dimensional at what level? Do you want to go? I mean, do you want to go building a business doing 50 grand? You’re great go do it everybody ought to do it. You want to build a business to a million dollars? Yeah Well, maybe not everybody can Oh You can build a million dollar business ten million is the interesting number because very few get to the ten million One of five a lot of people get stuck to one of five tenets, you know difficult Then from 10, do you want to do hundred million dollars you want to get to a billion? I mean the game changes at that point, right? But the more clear you are on your outcome of everything you’re doing life kids wife business career friendship spiritual exercise the more clear those outcomes are the more fluid the action is going to be taken because you know why you’re doing it and So yes, I think today’s social media fools the reality of being an entrepreneur Do you think you do the same by putting out the videos or do you try to make it clear with people that look this? Is taking work. I make it clear that it’s work. I make it clear that it’s pain But I tried to sell the reward And I try to sell the idea. It has to matter to you. You know, I like what you do here with creating content So about how many people started a podcast and they had potential but they stopped Think about it. Think about how much work it takes to run a podcast. Okay You have a wife you have a kid. You have a business. You have all these other things think about the effort it takes think about the discipline think about the level of consistency to find a guest to interview to questions to research to Content to all this stuff takes a lot of effort, right but you’re doing it. It’s very obvious you’re enjoying it and it matters to you and That’s why you’re effective if that makes any sense. Yeah, you see some people that are it doesn’t matter to them. They’re winging it So that’s the differentiator between an amateur and a pro Approach trying to figure out a way to be prolific because it matters to them So the one thing with value tainment that you get is You will heal me to hear me talk about clarity and it mattering to you so many times because if it does The world better get out of your way because you’re gonna get what you want and whatever level you want, right? You weren’t always a fan of capitalism But you switched and now believe it is the solution and there was a point where your dad was going through a series of operations and series of operations and you realized that you didn’t have the choice and that You had to rely on other people to take care of him. Is that what turned the switch with you? but yeah, look my my my body every time I go there my body just Yeah, I mean listen when that happened that day and and he says you’re not paying for this the government the taxpayers are paying for This you know, my dad’s in a hospitai having a heart attack yet his thirteenth heart attack and I’m looking at the same You know if this man dies, I never met my grandpa my kids have to know their grandpa and that’s my day

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