Jim Carrey Makes Late Show History With Grand New Orleans-Style Entrance


FOLKS, MY FIRST GUEST IS THE
STAR OF “SONIC THE HEDGEHOG” AND SHOWTIME’S
“KIDDING,” AND NOW THE CO-AUTHOR OF THE FORTHCOMING NOVEL,
“MEMOIRS AND MISINFORMATION.” PLEASE WELCOME TO “THE LATE
SHOW” JIM CARREY!( APPLAUSE )
♪ ♪ ♪( APPLAUSE )
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♪ ♪ ♪( APPLAUSE )
( CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ).
>>Stephen: JIM CARREY,
EVERYBODY! THERE YOU GO!>>OH, MY GOD!>>Stephen: OH, MY GOODNESS.>>WOW!>>Stephen: OH, MY GOODNESS.>>JON BATISTE AND THE STEPHEN
COLBERT SECOND PUNCHLINE DANCERS. OH, WOW.>>Stephen: WOW, IT’S SO
LOVELY TO HAVE YOU HERE.>>SO GOOD TO BE HERE FINALLY. ( CHEERS AND APPLAUSE )
OH, MY GOD. SO WONDERFUL TO BE HERE. I LOVE YOU SO MUCH. AND YOU’VE DONE SUCH AN
INCREDIBLE JOB, AND YOUR HEART AND YOUR HEAD ARE SO BEAUTIFULLY
INVOLVED WITH ALL THAT’S GOING ON. AND I RESPECT IT, AND I
APPRECIATE IT.>>Stephen: THANK YOU SO MUCH. THAT MEANS THE WORLD TO ME. ( CHEERS AND APPLAUSE )
THAT MEANS THE WORLD TO ME TO HEAR THAT FROM YOU.>>ABSOLUTELY.>>Stephen: THANK YOU SO MUCH.>>YOU’VE BEEN WONDERFUL.>>Stephen: THAT’S BEYOND
ANYTHING WE REHEARSED.>>NO, IT IS NOT. IT IS KIND OF OUTSIDE. BUT IT’S IMPORTANT TO ME THEY
SAY THAT.>>Stephen: WELL, HOW DO YOU
FEEL– WHEN YOU SEE THE WORLD RIGHT NOW, DO YOU FEEL– I FEEL
DREAD SOMETIMES, AND THEN I COME OUT HERE AND I FEEL BETTER WITH
THESE PEOPLE TO SHARE.>>I THINK, YOU KNOW, THIS IS
THE THING THAT PROVIDES ITS BALANCE, ISN’T IT, YOU KNOW?>>Stephen:
>>Stephen: BEING WITH THE PEOPLE?>>YEAH, EXACTLY. IT GIVES US A BREAK FROM THE
OBSTREPEROUS BLOVIATING BAG OF FLATULENCE THAT IS TRYING TO
TAKE THE SHINY CITY ON THE HILL AND TURN IT INTO A DUTCH OVEN.( LAUGHTER )
YOU KNOW? WE DON’T HAVE TO PULL THE COVERS
OVER OUR HEAD AND BREATHE DEEPLY THE AMBROSIA OF EVIL, YOU KNOW?>>Stephen: I LIKE THAT.>>I THINK WE CAN COME HERE AND
HAVE A GOOD TIME, YOU KNOW( CHEERS AND APPLAUSE )
>>Stephen: WELL, DID YOU–>>DID YOU EVER SEE– DID YOU
EVER SEE THE MASSES OF COMEDY AND TRAGEDY.>>Stephen: YEAH.>>YOU’VE SEEN, THAT YEAH, YEAH. IT’S MORE LIKE… LET’S DO IT
TOGETHER. WE’LL BE BOTH. YOU DO THAT, I’LL DO THE OTHER.( APPLAUSE )
BUT, ACTUALLY –>>Stephen: PUT THAT ON A
T-SHIRT.>>THAT’S NICE.>>Stephen: YEAH.>>THE REAL TRUTH OF IT IS BOTH
THOSE MASKS ARE TRAGEDY.>>Stephen: OH!>>AND THIS ONE IS JUST IN TOTAL
DENIAL.( LAUGHTER )
>>Stephen: I WANT TO TALK TO YOU ABOUT SOMETHING IMPORTANT. I DON’T WANT TO GET TOO DEEP
HERE. BUT “SONIC THE HEDGEHOG” MOVIE,
OKAY–>>THERE YOU GO.>>Stephen: IS COMING OUT.>>YES.>>AND YOU’RE DR. ROBOTNIK.>>LET’S PUT THINGS BACK IN
PERSPECTIVE.>>Stephen: KIND OF. I’M ALL FOR “SONIC THE HEDGEHOG”
MOVIES. WE ACTUALLY HAVE SONIC UP IN THE
DOME TONIGHT.>>WOW!>>Stephen: THERE’S SONIC.>>OH. THAT’S THE YIN. BUTES YES THE YANG?>>Stephen: JIM– THERE YOU
GO.>>OH, THERE YOU GO.( APPLAUSE )
>>THERE CAN BE NO LIGHT WITHOUT THE DARKNESS! DON’T YOU UNDERSTAND? IT’S THE WHOLE MESSAGE TONIGHT!( LAUGHTER )
>>Stephen: YOU PLAY DR. ROBOTNIK WHO HAS A 300 I.Q.. THAT>>THAT’S RIGHT. I HAD TO DUMB IT DOWN A BIT. YEAH, YEAH, YEAH. BUT HE’S A GREAT– GREAT
CHARACTER. HE’S KIND OF LIKE NIRKS
IKALOTESLA AFTER A RED BULL.>>Stephen: BEAUTIFUL
MUSTACHE.>>THE MUSTACHE WAS A PROBLEM.>>Stephen: DID YOU GROW THAT?>>NO, THAT WAS FROM CENTRAL
CASTING, THAT MUSTACHE. NIGHTLY WHIPLASH.>>Stephen: I WAS ABOUT TO
SAY.>>THAT MUSTACHE AND I HAD
CONSTANTLY ARGUED, YOU KNOW, THROUGH THE WHOLE PRODUCTION.>>Stephen: IF YOU ACTED TOO
HARD WOULD IT JUST COME ON?>>EXACTLY. IT WAS HALF OFF. IT WOULD NEVER COME FULLY OFF. IT WOULD COME HALF OFF AND
TICKLE MY COSTAR. I DON’T KNOW, VERY
UNCOMFORTABLE.>>Stephen: WE HAVE A CLIP
HERE. YOU CAN TELL ME WHAT’S GOING ON
IN THIS CLIP?>>SURE. FIRST OF ALL, IT’S NOT A CLIP. IT’S DIGITAL IN HOLLYWOOD NOW. THERE ARE NO CLIPS.>>Stephen: YOU CAN– CANNY
TELL US WHAT’S GOING TO HAPPEN IN THIS DIGITAL FILE WE’RE ABOUT
TO LOAD UP?>>EXACTLY. IN THIS LINK, THE– THE PURPOSE
OF THIS LINK IS THAT ROBOTNIK MEETS THE HIGHER UP OF THE
MILITARY OPERATION, AND HE’S THE SECRET MILITARY OPERATION. HE WANTS TO SHOW THEM WHERE THE
REAL POWER IS.>>Stephen: OKAY.>>NOW THAT IS AN EXCELLENT
SETUP!>>Stephen: YOU’RE A PRO. NO ONE’S SAYING YOU’RE NOT A
PRO.>>OKAY, OKAY.>>Stephen: JIM, LET’S GO TO
THE CLOUD.>>ARE YOU IN CHARGE HERE?>>YES I AM. NO! WRONG! I’M IN CHARGE–
>>MAJOR–>>I’M IN CHARGE! YOU NEVER SEEN ANYTHING LIKE
THIS BEFORE. THIS IS A TOP BANANA IN A WORLD
FULL OF HUNGRY LITTLE MONKEYS. ALLOW ME TO CLARIFY. IN A SEQUENTIALLY RANKED
HIERARCHY, THE DISPARITY BETWEEN US IS TOO FAST TO QUANTIFY.>>THE DOCTOR THINKS YOU’RE
BASIC.>>I’M INITIATING A SWEEP
SEQUENCE. 10 MILES IN EVERY DIRECTION
SHOULD SUFFICE. IS HE STILL LOOKING AT ME FUNNY?>>YES, HE IS.>>TELL HIM TO STOP OR I’LL PULL
UP HIS SEARCH HISTORY.>>Stephen: NICE. I KNOW I’M NOT SUPPOSED TO BE ON
HIS SIDE BUT I’M KIND OF PULLING FOR ROBOTNIK HERE. WE HAVE TO TAKE A BREAK BECAUSE
IT’S TV.>>DO WHAT YOU NEED TO DO.>>Stephen: WE’LL BE BACK WITH
MORE JIM CARREY.>>SELL SOME BAD STUFF.

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